L

(1911—1980), You Don't Have to Be in Who's Who to Know What's What

The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.

In a war of ideas it is people who get killed.

(1909—1966), Polish writer

No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.

(1869—1944), Canadian humorist

A sportsman is a man who, every now and then, simply has to get out and kill something. Not that he's cruel. He wouldn't hurt a fly. It's not big enough.

(1869—1944), Canadian humoristeducator

God takes care of fools, drunks, and the United States of America.

(1869—1944), Canadian humoristeducator, Literary Lapses, 1910

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

(1869—1944), Literary Lapses, 1910

I detest life-insurance agents; they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so.

(1945--)

U.S. comedian

Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.

(1956--)

U.S. boxer

We've all been blessed with God-given talents. Mine just happens to be beating people up.

U.S. baseball player

Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.