P

U.S. film-maker

I phoned my dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter.

(1948--)

British sci-fi author

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

(1948--), SF author, Small Gods

He says gods like to see an atheist around. Gives them something to aim at.

(1948--), SF author, Small Gods

The trouble with being a god is that you've got no one to pray to.

(1948--), Strata, 1981

Death was Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

"It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?"

Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.

Taxation, gentlemen, is very much like dairy farming. The task is to extract the maximum amount of milk with the minimum of moo. And I am afraid to say that these days all I get is moo.

Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.

(1785—1866), poet

Two reasons for drinking: one is, when you are thirsty, to cure it; the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it.